Banter (split from Rumours thread)

[bigalf]

Sorry to be negative on here about the love in on here about bigalf but I think he needs to take a hard look at himself!While I accept that in League 1 potential players might be spotted at Swilly Coop now we are in the Championship, surely Waitrose at Saltash Services is where are next Argyle heroes can be spotted.Morgan Whittaker purchasing Quinoa in Aisle 3 and we might be on to something.Slow news week at Home Park!

I am afraid that by spelling Kwop as Coop, it is clear that your blood is tainted and I suspect you re an Excreta fan in disguise innit.

 

[SurreyJanner]

I am afraid that by spelling Kwop as Coop, it is clear that your blood is tainted ani I suspect you re an Excreta fan in disguise innit.

My (non Janner) wife said to me earlier 'Co-Op', I shook my head and said 'no, its Kwop'

 

[TrailPlus]

Is their still interest in midfielder Harvey Macadam? Or is it just Fleetwood Mac rumours?

 

[bigalf]

Just like to announce that there will be no further information on here from me regarding players who are signing.

Unfortunately, for some reason the Swilly Kwop has banned me and threatened me with an injunction for persistent loitering in the International foods aisle.

And, despite my impeccable record of accurately stating who will sign, I refuse to go in Swilly Lidl.

I am truly humbled by the messages I have received from fellow Greens begging me not to stop my updates; telling me that I am the only source of genuine transfer news and that Chris Errington is a poor mans Bigalf.

Obviously this puts me in a bit of a quandary with the Kwop staff threatening me with an injunction. I already have a criminal record (Rick Astley's greatest hits) and don't need another.

I therefore have a cunning plan. Whilst the Kwop can ban me from the shop and carpark. They cannot ban me from Wolseley Road so I intend to set up an OP at the bus stop across the road. (The one the same side would be better but it has those horrible round bars rather than proper seats and they play havoc with my Chalfonts)

I of course thought 'oh the constant buses stopping will block my view' . However I then realised it is Plymouth Citybus so due to Operational Difficulties/Driver Absence/Passenger taken ill/Congestion/ Mechanical issues. (Delete as necessary) these will be few and far between.

Final issue is that the Knuckle Draggers on the door of the Kwop have been primed to look out for an Argyle fan so I am getting out my trusty binoculars and going in disguise. They will never suspect that I am an Argyle Fan, so If you see me just wink and say nothing.

 

[Shocking]

I am truly humbled by the messages I have received from fellow Greens begging me not to stop my updates; telling me that I am the only source of genuine transfer news and that Chris Errington is a poor mans Bigalf.

Obviously this puts me in a bit of a quandary with the Kwop staff threatening me with an injunction. I already have a criminal record (Rick Astley's greatest hits) and don't need another.

I therefore have a cunning plan. Whilst the Kwop can ban me from the shop and carpark. They cannot ban me from Wolseley Road so I intend to set up an OP at the bus stop across the road. (The one the same side would be better but it has those horrible round bars rather than proper seats and they play havoc with my Chalfonts)

I of course thought 'oh the constant buses stopping will block my view' . However I then realised it is Plymouth Citybus so due to Operational Difficulties/Driver Absence/Passenger taken ill/Congestion/ Mechanical issues. (Delete as necessary) these will be few and far between.

Final issue is that the Knuckle Draggers on the door of the Kwop have been primed to look out for an Argyle fan so I am getting out my trusty binoculars and going in disguise. They will never suspect that I am an Argyle Fan, so If you see me just wink and say nothing.



View attachment 10525

You don’t look at all ”shady” in that photo 😂

 

[Argyleloyal]

Just like to announce that there will be no further information on here from me regarding players who are signing.

Unfortunately, for some reason the Swilly Kwop has banned me and threatened me with an injunction for persistent loitering in the International foods aisle.

And, despite my impeccable record of accurately stating who will sign, I refuse to go in Swilly Lidl.

Just try and bargain with the security guard who’s been for years ha ha

 

[German Shepherd]

I am truly humbled by the messages I have received from fellow Greens begging me not to stop my updates; telling me that I am the only source of genuine transfer news and that Chris Errington is a poor mans Bigalf.

Obviously this puts me in a bit of a quandary with the Kwop staff threatening me with an injunction. I already have a criminal record (Rick Astley's greatest hits) and don't need another.

I therefore have a cunning plan. Whilst the Kwop can ban me from the shop and carpark. They cannot ban me from Wolseley Road so I intend to set up an OP at the bus stop across the road. (The one the same side would be better but it has those horrible round bars rather than proper seats and they play havoc with my Chalfonts)

I of course thought 'oh the constant buses stopping will block my view' . However I then realised it is Plymouth Citybus so due to Operational Difficulties/Driver Absence/Passenger taken ill/Congestion/ Mechanical issues. (Delete as necessary) these will be few and far between.

Final issue is that the Knuckle Draggers on the door of the Kwop have been primed to look out for an Argyle fan so I am getting out my trusty binoculars and going in disguise. They will never suspect that I am an Argyle Fan, so If you see me just wink and say nothing.



View attachment 10525

No wonder Argyle haven't signed many. They turn up at the Swilly Coop to buy some pretzels & a skinny latte, take one look at you, & skedaddle back ooop North.

 

[Jannerz]

No wonder Argyle haven't signed many. They turn up at the Swilly Coop to buy some pretzels & a skinny latte, take one look at you, & skedaddle back ooop North.

It’s KWOP

 

[German Shepherd]

It’s KWOP

I stand corrected 😄

 

[Shadowknight]

I am truly humbled by the messages I have received from fellow Greens begging me not to stop my updates; telling me that I am the only source of genuine transfer news and that Chris Errington is a poor mans Bigalf.

Obviously this puts me in a bit of a quandary with the Kwop staff threatening me with an injunction. I already have a criminal record (Rick Astley's greatest hits) and don't need another.

I therefore have a cunning plan. Whilst the Kwop can ban me from the shop and carpark. They cannot ban me from Wolseley Road so I intend to set up an OP at the bus stop across the road. (The one the same side would be better but it has those horrible round bars rather than proper seats and they play havoc with my Chalfonts)

I of course thought 'oh the constant buses stopping will block my view' . However I then realised it is Plymouth Citybus so due to Operational Difficulties/Driver Absence/Passenger taken ill/Congestion/ Mechanical issues. (Delete as necessary) these will be few and far between.

Final issue is that the Knuckle Draggers on the door of the Kwop have been primed to look out for an Argyle fan so I am getting out my trusty binoculars and going in disguise. They will never suspect that I am an Argyle Fan, so If you see me just wink and say nothing.



View attachment 10525

Is it just me but I don't remember bigalf being funny before...

 

[Plastic Janner]

I stand corrected 😄

You could try and blend in and avoid detection, try teddy bear pyjamas and fluffy slippers, the security will think you're a local valued customer

 

[mutley marvel]

I am so glad i am an exile - no excitement where i live

 

[BramcoteGreen]

bigalf, all I am suggesting is a short trip over the bridge,( regularly made by Neil Warnock) and look out for young fit athletic men who move at great speed through Waitrose.While this policy has got some public figures in difficulty recently I’m sure your alias will protect you and you can give the fanbase what it needs.We need incoming!

 

[Keith Hennessey]

Is it just me but I don't remember bigalf being funny before...

Who is bigalf ?

 

[Altarnun Green]

Who is bigalf ?

He's the guy opposite the Kwop in Swilly in the bus stop in disguise.. doh!