One Game at a Time: You’re Only Here for the Lava Bread
The Swans (A) February 3rd
A gusty wind blows flickering candles across the nation as all are seemingly gripped by the machinations of a few treacherous individuals as they meet for their nightly gathering. One man holds sway, his history one of triumph and strategic majesty. But has he overplayed his hand? Tonight, we recap the latest episode of EFL Traitors: The Defenestration.
Three shadowy figures lower hoodies and cluster around the fire.
$$: So boys, what do we think? It’s been a month and so far I think we done brilliant.
MH: Yeah boss, apart from those defeats. We got the away monkey off our back though. Poor old Wazza.
PC: Just need to start scoring a few goals and getting a home win.
$$ Let’s start this weekend then.
MH: It’s Leicester boss.
$$: Ok, well we need some bodies in. I was thinking we could get Lukey on a perm.
PC: Haven’t we already got him boss?
$$: Well, yes but imagine what a statement it would be if we changed his loan to a perm. I mean we did it with Morgs and it worked a treat.
PC: That’s true but Morgs was, I dunno.
$$: What?
PC: Morgs was like, well really good.
$$: Ok well the recruitment guys here have signed some bloke from Belgium. Apparently, he was on our list at Argyle.
MH: We didn’t ever see the list. They were really horrid when I asked for a copy.
$$: Well, no, but the boys here reckon he definitely was on the list, pinky swear. I mean they wouldn’t tell us porkies. Plus, and this is gonna be big, we are getting an Argyle striker in.
PC: That’s mental. But then his dad was a Stokie but that potentially changes our season.
$$: No it isn’t Morgs. Better.
MH: Hotdog!!!!! Just what we need. Pace. Finishing. Effort. Everything these lazy b’s up here are missing. Including the goal.
PC: Boss you’re a genius.
$$: Well.
The solemn knock on the door, and a cloaked figure hobbles in.
MH: I was sure Hotdog was taller than that.
The figure sweeps his hood down.
$$: There you go boys. It’s Niall
MH & PC: A’right Niall.
NE: Hi there. This is exciting. Although my hammys a bit tight after all those stairs.
MH: There were only three.
$$: No worries, Niall. (To the others) Where’s ET?
MH: Gone home, I think.
And thus ends what was by common consent in the inward looking football world, the quietest January window for many years. Try telling that to Andrew Parkinson as he scribbles furiously on the name badges he is insisting all the new faces wear whilst he learns all their names.
The change for the club in recent weeks is nothing compared to that of comparing it to recent years. We have gone from being excited about paying a fee for Nathan Blissett, to being the side that bats away with nary a second thought, a concrete multi million euro bid for our leading scorer from no less than Lazio.
With the departure of almost the entire Schumacher era coaching team we have seen the beginning of a new and to date unbeaten dynasty under Ian Foster. This despite the departure of all of the preseason loanees, some to rivals like Finn to Middlesbrough, others to relegation haunted giants of the game, like Lewis Warrington whose injury hit beginning resulted in a return to Everton. KKH went back to Villa potentially to compete for a first team berth. And one to Stoke.
Arrivals have been swift and impressive. Phillips and Devine from Spurs, Forshaw from Norwich via the EPL and Leeds who also sent us Gyabi. Sorinola became our second ex Swan, returning from his Belgian sojourn, and winning Argyle hearts with his enthusiastic celebrations after a home win over Cardiff. With two FA Cup fixtures in the mix Foster has had a chance to run the rule over his squad and the end of the window saw a rebalancing of that squad that meant that if the overall window was quiet, the PL2 windows were banging and flapping like Storm Foster was intent on doing some structural rearranging.
Apart from the drip drip of interest in Morgan Whittaker, we saw Tyreik Wright return to his temporary Bradford lodgings from whence we acquired him, indirectly, via Villa. A positive move, slightly tempered by his injury in his first game.
A more curious, but none the less welcome move, was the arrival of yet another Villa loanee, in Lino Sousa, the talented full back, signed by Villa from Arsenal, and then promptly told not to unpack his boots as he was heading West to resume contact with his former England coach Foster.
Heading the other way up the M5/4 corridor were not one but two Pilgrims. In a somewhat disconcerting turn of events we have had to witness the transformation of Whycome to Argyle on Wye, as first Matt Butcher ended his Pilgrimage to join them permanently, and shortly afterwards Saxon Early arrived, intent of gaining his fitness before returning, we assume, to resume his Championship career at Home Park.
For Butcher, the security of a longer deal makes perfect sense, and after his final performance for the Greens was to provide the defence shredding pass for Moose to set up the deserved Argyle equaliser at Elland Road, he can at least leave on a high. I am not sure anyone wanted his final major contribution to the club to be his own goal at Cardiff. His key goals at Accrington and the Six Toes were better guides to his contributions.
Just to complete the need to now hang on for an extra half hour to get the final scores, Argyle on Wye also signed “Dutch Nigel” Lonwijk from Wolves. Graham Coughlan did well to swoop as quickly as he did for Luke Jephcott to sign for Newport, or he might have ended up there too.
The draw at Leeds also resulted in a handy financial windfall, of both an extra sell out home game and a TV appearance on the BBC, with Leeds also likely to be fielding a less than full strength side again as they focus on their pursuit of the sides above them battling for the two automatic slots. Should Argyle secure a win then their reward will either be a trip to their generous loan club Villa or a return for unfinished business at Stamford Bridge.
In the meantime this weekend sees a trip into International territory again as we head back to the “Land of My Fathers“ and a much changed Swansea City from the team that schooled Argyle earlier in the season at Home Park.
It is fair to say that Swansea played Argyle in what has been so far their only real purple patch. After that a poor run resulted in Michael Duff, who never really gelled with the Swansea fans, departing after less than six months in charge. His replacement, Luke Williams, was one of the multiple names in the frame for the Argyle job prior to the appointment of “The Fozz”, based primarily on his success at Notts County.
Interestingly the man whose most prominent piece of social media was an explanation of why his County side scored so many goals from corners being a statistical quirk of taking them short, saw his first Swansea League goal from a long corner, headed in by Harry Darling. Argyle will be aware of that threat from his MK Dons days.
Swansea’s recent form has been, shall we say, indifferent with two five goal drubbings on the South coast at Saints in the League and Bournemouth in the FA Cup and their last win being on New Year’s Day at home to The Albion.
After a relatively quiet window, ex Argyle winger Yannick Bolasie left the club after being unable to agree an extension to his short-term deal, but a series of wingers arrived in Charles Sagoe Jr from Arsenal and Przemyslaw Placheta from Norwich, who looks like he could be a midfielder to rival Sammy Szmodics on the Scrabble board for away trips.
The unexpected arrival at the Vetch (alright Swansea.com stadium) was Brazilian Ronald, a seven-figure signing and apparently a pacey strong forward runner. Swan’s fans will be hoping he is more Ronaldo than Ronald. Argyle fans will be hoping for a red wig and clown shoes and do you want fries with that.
As Argyle have now become harder to beat, home or away, the ever-extending run towards that elusive first away win becomes an increasing focus. They have an OK record at Swansea but their last win, a one nil courtesy of a debut nepo baby goal by Blair Sturrock was twenty-two years ago.
Possibly their best win was the Steve Guinan loanee inspired three two, after falling behind two nil in 1999. Guinan, who scored seven times in eleven games on loan eventually arrived permanently, but then fell out with Sturrock senior and was eventually asked to train with the youth team whilst his future was resolved. Now a respected coach and player development specialist who worked for many years with the FA, Guinan also witnessed the Jimmy Glass moment in his spells with Argyle.
Perhaps more fondly remembered was Swansea born Russell Coughlin, who arrived at Argyle from Carlisle and was a wholehearted midfield dynamo. He is most remembered for his third goal in the four-nil pasting of Bristol City in the 85/6 promotion side, which arced in direct from a corner. Eventually doing the tour of all three Devon sides as well as a stint at his hometown club, Coughlin sadly died in 2016 after a medical emergency following a car accident.
The game itself on Saturday will be dedicated to a local cancer charity Maggies Centre, a worthy cause and one which will no doubt be supported be generously by all, including the sold out away end.
We will of course be seeing the first return to Swansea of their former player Morgan Whittaker, revisiting the scene of his hat-trick against Argyle, so it would seem like a re-balancing might be in order.
We hope for a win in the Mumbles, as the gradually reshaped, yet reassuringly familiar team takes the field. Will Sousa march straight into the side? How many ex-Swans will take on the current iteration?
Argyle sit atop the mini league that probably contains the three sides that will leave the Division via the trapdoor route. A win could propel them to within reach of that mid table security that would constitute a significant achievement in our first season back.
The window has slammed. Our playing crown jewels remain intact and new gems have arrived to be polished and improved.
COYG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The Swans (A) February 3rd
A gusty wind blows flickering candles across the nation as all are seemingly gripped by the machinations of a few treacherous individuals as they meet for their nightly gathering. One man holds sway, his history one of triumph and strategic majesty. But has he overplayed his hand? Tonight, we recap the latest episode of EFL Traitors: The Defenestration.
Three shadowy figures lower hoodies and cluster around the fire.
$$: So boys, what do we think? It’s been a month and so far I think we done brilliant.
MH: Yeah boss, apart from those defeats. We got the away monkey off our back though. Poor old Wazza.
PC: Just need to start scoring a few goals and getting a home win.
$$ Let’s start this weekend then.
MH: It’s Leicester boss.
$$: Ok, well we need some bodies in. I was thinking we could get Lukey on a perm.
PC: Haven’t we already got him boss?
$$: Well, yes but imagine what a statement it would be if we changed his loan to a perm. I mean we did it with Morgs and it worked a treat.
PC: That’s true but Morgs was, I dunno.
$$: What?
PC: Morgs was like, well really good.
$$: Ok well the recruitment guys here have signed some bloke from Belgium. Apparently, he was on our list at Argyle.
MH: We didn’t ever see the list. They were really horrid when I asked for a copy.
$$: Well, no, but the boys here reckon he definitely was on the list, pinky swear. I mean they wouldn’t tell us porkies. Plus, and this is gonna be big, we are getting an Argyle striker in.
PC: That’s mental. But then his dad was a Stokie but that potentially changes our season.
$$: No it isn’t Morgs. Better.
MH: Hotdog!!!!! Just what we need. Pace. Finishing. Effort. Everything these lazy b’s up here are missing. Including the goal.
PC: Boss you’re a genius.
$$: Well.
The solemn knock on the door, and a cloaked figure hobbles in.
MH: I was sure Hotdog was taller than that.
The figure sweeps his hood down.
$$: There you go boys. It’s Niall
MH & PC: A’right Niall.
NE: Hi there. This is exciting. Although my hammys a bit tight after all those stairs.
MH: There were only three.
$$: No worries, Niall. (To the others) Where’s ET?
MH: Gone home, I think.
And thus ends what was by common consent in the inward looking football world, the quietest January window for many years. Try telling that to Andrew Parkinson as he scribbles furiously on the name badges he is insisting all the new faces wear whilst he learns all their names.
The change for the club in recent weeks is nothing compared to that of comparing it to recent years. We have gone from being excited about paying a fee for Nathan Blissett, to being the side that bats away with nary a second thought, a concrete multi million euro bid for our leading scorer from no less than Lazio.
With the departure of almost the entire Schumacher era coaching team we have seen the beginning of a new and to date unbeaten dynasty under Ian Foster. This despite the departure of all of the preseason loanees, some to rivals like Finn to Middlesbrough, others to relegation haunted giants of the game, like Lewis Warrington whose injury hit beginning resulted in a return to Everton. KKH went back to Villa potentially to compete for a first team berth. And one to Stoke.
Arrivals have been swift and impressive. Phillips and Devine from Spurs, Forshaw from Norwich via the EPL and Leeds who also sent us Gyabi. Sorinola became our second ex Swan, returning from his Belgian sojourn, and winning Argyle hearts with his enthusiastic celebrations after a home win over Cardiff. With two FA Cup fixtures in the mix Foster has had a chance to run the rule over his squad and the end of the window saw a rebalancing of that squad that meant that if the overall window was quiet, the PL2 windows were banging and flapping like Storm Foster was intent on doing some structural rearranging.
Apart from the drip drip of interest in Morgan Whittaker, we saw Tyreik Wright return to his temporary Bradford lodgings from whence we acquired him, indirectly, via Villa. A positive move, slightly tempered by his injury in his first game.
A more curious, but none the less welcome move, was the arrival of yet another Villa loanee, in Lino Sousa, the talented full back, signed by Villa from Arsenal, and then promptly told not to unpack his boots as he was heading West to resume contact with his former England coach Foster.
Heading the other way up the M5/4 corridor were not one but two Pilgrims. In a somewhat disconcerting turn of events we have had to witness the transformation of Whycome to Argyle on Wye, as first Matt Butcher ended his Pilgrimage to join them permanently, and shortly afterwards Saxon Early arrived, intent of gaining his fitness before returning, we assume, to resume his Championship career at Home Park.
For Butcher, the security of a longer deal makes perfect sense, and after his final performance for the Greens was to provide the defence shredding pass for Moose to set up the deserved Argyle equaliser at Elland Road, he can at least leave on a high. I am not sure anyone wanted his final major contribution to the club to be his own goal at Cardiff. His key goals at Accrington and the Six Toes were better guides to his contributions.
Just to complete the need to now hang on for an extra half hour to get the final scores, Argyle on Wye also signed “Dutch Nigel” Lonwijk from Wolves. Graham Coughlan did well to swoop as quickly as he did for Luke Jephcott to sign for Newport, or he might have ended up there too.
The draw at Leeds also resulted in a handy financial windfall, of both an extra sell out home game and a TV appearance on the BBC, with Leeds also likely to be fielding a less than full strength side again as they focus on their pursuit of the sides above them battling for the two automatic slots. Should Argyle secure a win then their reward will either be a trip to their generous loan club Villa or a return for unfinished business at Stamford Bridge.
In the meantime this weekend sees a trip into International territory again as we head back to the “Land of My Fathers“ and a much changed Swansea City from the team that schooled Argyle earlier in the season at Home Park.
It is fair to say that Swansea played Argyle in what has been so far their only real purple patch. After that a poor run resulted in Michael Duff, who never really gelled with the Swansea fans, departing after less than six months in charge. His replacement, Luke Williams, was one of the multiple names in the frame for the Argyle job prior to the appointment of “The Fozz”, based primarily on his success at Notts County.
Interestingly the man whose most prominent piece of social media was an explanation of why his County side scored so many goals from corners being a statistical quirk of taking them short, saw his first Swansea League goal from a long corner, headed in by Harry Darling. Argyle will be aware of that threat from his MK Dons days.
Swansea’s recent form has been, shall we say, indifferent with two five goal drubbings on the South coast at Saints in the League and Bournemouth in the FA Cup and their last win being on New Year’s Day at home to The Albion.
After a relatively quiet window, ex Argyle winger Yannick Bolasie left the club after being unable to agree an extension to his short-term deal, but a series of wingers arrived in Charles Sagoe Jr from Arsenal and Przemyslaw Placheta from Norwich, who looks like he could be a midfielder to rival Sammy Szmodics on the Scrabble board for away trips.
The unexpected arrival at the Vetch (alright Swansea.com stadium) was Brazilian Ronald, a seven-figure signing and apparently a pacey strong forward runner. Swan’s fans will be hoping he is more Ronaldo than Ronald. Argyle fans will be hoping for a red wig and clown shoes and do you want fries with that.
As Argyle have now become harder to beat, home or away, the ever-extending run towards that elusive first away win becomes an increasing focus. They have an OK record at Swansea but their last win, a one nil courtesy of a debut nepo baby goal by Blair Sturrock was twenty-two years ago.
Possibly their best win was the Steve Guinan loanee inspired three two, after falling behind two nil in 1999. Guinan, who scored seven times in eleven games on loan eventually arrived permanently, but then fell out with Sturrock senior and was eventually asked to train with the youth team whilst his future was resolved. Now a respected coach and player development specialist who worked for many years with the FA, Guinan also witnessed the Jimmy Glass moment in his spells with Argyle.
Perhaps more fondly remembered was Swansea born Russell Coughlin, who arrived at Argyle from Carlisle and was a wholehearted midfield dynamo. He is most remembered for his third goal in the four-nil pasting of Bristol City in the 85/6 promotion side, which arced in direct from a corner. Eventually doing the tour of all three Devon sides as well as a stint at his hometown club, Coughlin sadly died in 2016 after a medical emergency following a car accident.
The game itself on Saturday will be dedicated to a local cancer charity Maggies Centre, a worthy cause and one which will no doubt be supported be generously by all, including the sold out away end.
We will of course be seeing the first return to Swansea of their former player Morgan Whittaker, revisiting the scene of his hat-trick against Argyle, so it would seem like a re-balancing might be in order.
We hope for a win in the Mumbles, as the gradually reshaped, yet reassuringly familiar team takes the field. Will Sousa march straight into the side? How many ex-Swans will take on the current iteration?
Argyle sit atop the mini league that probably contains the three sides that will leave the Division via the trapdoor route. A win could propel them to within reach of that mid table security that would constitute a significant achievement in our first season back.
The window has slammed. Our playing crown jewels remain intact and new gems have arrived to be polished and improved.
COYG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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